Impending Grandparenthood

Vintage Baby Shower Invite

   You might need a cup of tea or coffee for this one, and a biscuit or two...

     When my son and daughter-in-law called us back in late November on Skype, and wanted to speak to both my husband and I together, I was pretty sure of the reason why, baby on the way, and of course, my new found grandmotherly intuition was right on the money!  With a due date of August 8, I thought I had more time to get my thoughts together about my impending grandparenthood, but alas, there is a good chance I will join the ranks of grandmothers all over the world sooner than later. My daughter-in-law is in the hospital with contractions today! Although she is still 6 weeks from the due date, there is a good chance she will have the baby early. She and my son were here a couple weeks ago for a visit and baby showers, and she did look like she was ready to go, so maybe the due date was off by a few weeks? Regardless, it is time to think about this new role of Abuelita, which is the Spanish term of endearment for grandmother, and what I hope all my grandchildren will call me.

Me with one of my Abuelitas

     I had the chance to think about grandparents when my first son was born, making my parents grandparents for the first time. I watched my parents fall in love with him before he was even born and then fall madly in love with him once he arrived. It often brought tears to my eyes to watch them with him, as well as with each of the other three that came along. We, the parents, were also in love with him, delighted beyond reason, he was so beautiful and perfect. But as parents, we were also responsible for raising him to be a "good" person, based on what we believed qualified as "good." Good manners, morals, ethics, hygiene...all that stuff. Lots of love, affection and support along with solid boundaries, discipline and consistency. As I watched my parents with my newborn son, I knew that I wanted it to be that way always. I did not want them to have to be disciplinarians, I just wanted them to enjoy him and I wanted him to enjoy his time with them as well. So I made a point of not asking my parents to be long term caregivers of my son. They would babysit and help us out occasionally with childcare, but not on any kind of regular basis. And even when my mom retired early and I could have asked her to watch my kids a couple days a week, I refused to even think about it. I also believed that my parents had done their stint as parents already. They deserved to enjoy their retirement and their grandchildren, not sign up for the parenting thing all over again.

     And I can now say that my kids have a wonderful relationship with their grandparents. They will spend a week with them, one at a time, or my parents will come up and watch them all for a few days while my husband and I have a little getaway. But it is fun, they are not raising them, just enjoying them. They aren't perfect kids, but they do mind and they are not afraid of my parents in any way. Now how do I plan to be a perfect Abuelita? I believe in living with intention, so I know I must think about this, envision the type of relationship I want to have with my grandchildren and plan accordingly. I have a couple difficulties to tackle though. And if anyone has ANY suggestions on how to think about this, please leave me a comment!
     Because I have an 11 year old (as well as a 17 and 19) at home, it will be hard to "spoil" a grandchild here. When my son was born, my brothers and I were all in our twenties. My brothers were on the spoiling bandwagon too, and never felt any competition with their nephew and then other nieces and nephews that came along. But an 11 year old is different. When my youngest brother had his first over five years ago, my then 6 year old was very jealous of all the attention the "new" grandchild was getting. She had been the youngest grandchild and now was no longer in the main spotlight. How will she feel when she sees me all gooey over my first grandchild, while she looks on? Knowing her the way I do,

it will be very difficult for her. She is a very empathetic and compassionate girl. But she is still very young. All kids need a lot of attention, but during those tweenage years, they have so many self doubts and seem to need extra attention. It is also an awkward time of life, your body making all this hormonal commotion that you have no control over. I can see everyone with their backs to her as they ooh and aah over the baby. And I will be torn. I want to be the grandmother my mom was and is, but I am still in the middle of mothering a young one myself. How will I strike a balance here? I know how to love and have plenty to go around, that is not the issue at all. But my first born son will be expecting me to be completely enthralled and mesmerized by my new grandchild (which I will be, believe me), while my 11 year old will be watching to see if I happen to love that new grandchild more than her. I'm chuckling now, but I know this will really be something I will have to deal with shortly.
     So I am very excited, wondering if I will be a grandmother within the next few hours or days, and also wondering how to make the parent/grandparent juxtaposition work in the most loving way possible. Wish me luck or leave me some advice, it is all appreciated!

Where do I start?

Balloons heading out, view from Wayne Hill

     What an amazing weekend!!! It was like riding one wave of joy after another. It started on Friday, with the first, and hopefully annual, Traverse City Balloon Classic. We headed downtown to the open space, taking a quick detour up Wayne Hill to see the balloons that had already set off. I was like a kid in a candy store, absolutely gleeful, I know my kids thought I was nuts, but ever since I saw a video of the Albuquerque International Balloon Festival, I have been enamored of the whole hot air balloon thing, especially when they are part of a big gathering. A visit to the

Albuquerque event is on my bucket list, and this was a wonderful taste of what lies ahead, since I know I'll get there someday! There were so many people in town for this three day event, but everyone was in such a great mood, old and young alike. It was wonderful to see how many other people are delighted by this kind of magic. I took a lot of photographs, but am only posting my favorites. The colors and patterns were incredible eye candy. I will be working on some balloon journal pages this week and hopefully, will post some of those by next weekend. I truly hope this becomes an annual event and that maybe, just maybe, I will get into a balloon next year and go for a ride. I am afraid of heights, but I will have to conquer it because I really, really, REALLY want to do this someday.

Balloons being inflated for the evening "glow."

    If you ever get the chance to attend any mass hot air balloon event, don't miss it. Forget the dishes, take some motrin if you have pain, call a friend or call a cab, but get there, you own't regret it. It was really a magical evening that I will never forget!

My hubby and two of my kids with Balloons in back.

A gorgeous balloon over downtown TC!

One of my favorite balloons over TC.

We saw this one inflated and launch, so cool!

My youngest posing with another beautiful balloon over TC.

     And even though I was riding higher than I have in a while, it got even better! The next day, Saturday, I actually got to cross something off my bucket list, Woo Woo! I got a chance to attend a live recording of "Prairie Home Companion," at the Interlochen Center for Performing Arts. So tomorrow, I'll post photos and all the details of that wonderful adventure...

Redesigning my blog...again.

What do YOU love?

     You would think, that with four college classes, three kids at home, a husband and a home to take care of, that I would not have time to mess around with the design of my blog. Well, you would be right and I would just ignore all that stuff and just play to my heart's content. My blog is a work in progress. I like to update it with current details of my life and life around me. But I also update the appearance based on my current interests, skills and the latest technology. I get lazy sometimes and just pick something from the Blogger template designer, like my newest "Valentine" background, with all these hearts. But I also like to adjust the size and layout sometimes, or add new features. From my latest schooling, I know enough to be dangerous, but not enough to really go in there and shake things up, redesign from scratch and create new interactive elements, but soon, soon.
     I think that I will go and play around with my visual journal supplies and create an original Valentine's background to upload. The Valentine bug has bitten me and I won't be happy without hearts all over the place for a few weeks, most of them chocolate. And what's wrong with that? Hearts represent love. All kinds of love. I love myself, the hubby, our children, my parents, my friends, my classes, my church, my reading parlour, my shoes, my cookbooks, my spice cupboard, 80's music, dancing, pansies, old dishes, high tea, white, turquoise blue, our bunny Stella, Downton Abbey (part IV is on this Sunday!), fresh veggies, beach glass, hunting for morels, tools, jewelry, melting glass, grilled cheese sandwiches, the scent of lavender, "The Fencing Master," old mirrors, upcycling, Fustini's balsamics and olive oils, Peruvian blue opal, singing, Texas BBQ, the northern lights, warm socks, flannel pajamas, word games, fresh raspberries and oh, the list goes on...and on...and on...well,  you get the idea. Do you ever make a list of all those things you love? Or things that bring you joy? It feels wonderful to make a list of so many good things. One more thing I love...

Happy New Year!

Me and my hubby New Year's Eve 2010/2011

     I love a new year. A mental chance to begin again, to start over or to start or begin something new altogether. Last year found me starting college, again. This time, in pursuit of a new career in Web Design. I have loved being back in school and the new path I've chosen. It has felt like a rebirth at many times. New passions, new experiences, intensity and focus, purpose and dedication. Although there have been some struggles with certain instructors and limited amounts of time for studying and projects, I have relished the whole year and I am excited to start my new semester in two weeks.
     Last year, my daughter graduated from high school, and I was so proud to see her graduation ceremony. She also started college with me and has done well and "likes" it so far. My oldest son got married just before Christmas last year, so he just celebrated his first anniversary in Texas. He also graduated from his initial Navy schooling program and then called us a few weeks ago with news of impending parenthood! I'm going to be a grandmother next summer, holy moly! How much fun will that be? I have always loved babies and children, so it will be fun to spoil my son's baby. My other son was in Oklahoma this year and played the bad guy, "Jud Fry." So different from his natural personality, but he did a wonderful job, so proud of him too. My youngest took up the oboe and loves it. She is getting it quickly and enjoys her lessons and practicing, which just blows me away, since the other three have had lessons for various instruments over the years and I always had to "push" them to practice. My husband's business is going well, new accounts and new employees this past year, all good. So overall, although it would be nice to be a little more set financially (which I say every year), it has been a wonderful year.
     So what are my resolutions, hopes and dreams for 2011? It is kind of like making the 44 things I want to do before I turned 45 post last year. How about 12 things (one for each month) I want to achieve, do, see before 2012? That sounds good to me...and away we go!

1.)   Create a bedroom retreat.
       *Involves purging, organizing, painting and decorating.
2.)   Take a yoga class.
       *I bought a pair of yoga pants this week...now to find a class and make the commitment.
3.)   Clear out and organize my basement.
       *I have seen "Hoarders" and do not want to ever be mistaken for one and also want to "take back" my basement! This is a small house and every square inch is too precious to waste.
4.)   Create and publish my own personal "art" website.
       *http://www.queenoftides.com...coming soon!
5.)   Create 10 websites for other people.
       *Mostly friends and family right now. But 2012 will be wide open!
6.)   Write 1 app for my cell phone or other small device.
       *Just something simple so I can get my toe dipped into that crazy pool.
7.)   Go to church every week we are in town, healthy and able.
       *I love Grace Episcopal church and feel so wonderful every time I attend. The sermons make me cry and make me want to be a better person. The best gift I could give myself on this list.
8.)   Read non-college required books, at least 5, preferably 25.
       *I have a stack of books I have been wanting to read over the last year and barely made a dent. So hard to spend all day with textbooks reading and trying to understand things and then to read for pleasure after, which I love to do. But I borrowed my one of my husband's new Christmas gifts and started reading this week, "The Last Lecture," and it is wonderful!
9.)   Use my pasta machine.
       *I love fresh pasta, but the local market that used to make and sell it no longer does this. Sooo, I bought a pasta machine two years ago and it is still in the box. I have to open it up and make some, I just have to!
10.) Use my tortilla press (probably going to do that today!!!)
       *I had some homemade "style" corn tortillas from Meijers, our local grocery store, and they are out of this world! So I bought a press this fall and took it out of the box this week, I'm almost there!
11.) Work with my visual journal supplies at least twice a week.
        *I love playing with all the art supplies I have for visual journaling. My Christmas cards were created with the same technique and I feel so great after finishing a piece. I have to make time for this particular art in my life, no excuses!
12.) Exercise in some way, shape or form for a total of 20 minutes everyday.
       *Ok, this is a "should" that should be a "need" and a "want," but to be honest, I don't make it a priority. But I'm not getting any younger, I do have aches and pains that I couldn't imagine having 20 years ago. By putting it on the list, I am making a commitment to move this into the "need" and "want" part of my life.
13.) Ok, one more that I just have to add: Get on my torch and make some beads!
       *Although web design in my main focus, visual journal at the forefront of my creative mind lately, I do love melting glass and creating beads. But I do have make the time if I don't want to lose all my skills. Beadmaking does require practice or you lose the fine motor skills you develop over time. It is what it is.